In addition to being a long-running TV series, HBO’s Tales from the Crypt also spent time on the silver scream, and here’s how those efforts stack up. Originally airing from 1989 to 1996, Tales from the Crypt was based on the popular horror comics put out by EC Comics back in the 1950s, which included a title of the same name. It would go on to become one of the most beloved horror anthology shows in history, with puppet host The Crypt Keeper becoming a pop culture icon.
A few years back, M. Night Shyamalan was set to produce a reboot of Tales from the Crypt for TNT, but due to legal issues, the project ended up abandoned. Maybe that’s for the best, as it wasn’t set to include The Crypt Keeper or the series’ classic opening credits sequence, which likely would’ve disappointed many longtime fans who opted to tune in to the reboot. Still, that leaves fans with seven great seasons and four feature films from the crypt to look back on.
Without any further ado, here are the four Tales from the Crypt movies, ranked worst to best. This includes the pre-HBO Tales from the Crypt film made by Amicus in the 1970s, but does not include fellow Amicus anthology Vault of Horror, which while often considered a sequel, is not officially a Tales from the Crypt-branded movie.
4. Tales from the Crypt: Ritual (2006)
We begin with a film that a lot of fans may not even know exists, Tales from the Crypt: Ritual. Dumped to North American DVD in 2006 by Dimension Films, Ritual was actually completed and released in some countries way back in 2002. That really should tell those interested all they need to know about the film’s quality, or in this case lack thereof. Set in Jamaica (explaining the Crypt Keeper’s terrible dreadlocks seen above), Ritual’s plot is actually a loose remake of 1943’s I Walked with a Zombie. While talented actors like Jennifer Grey, Craig Sheffer, and Tim Curry star, their efforts can’t save this boring mess of a movie that’s not worthy of the Tales from the Crypt name.
3. Tales from the Crypt: Bordello of Blood (1996)
While 1996’s Tales from the Crypt: Bordello of Blood is by no means a very good movie overall, it’s Citizen Kane compared to Ritual. However, what one gets out of it will have a lot to do with their patience for the comedy stylings of star Dennis Miller, who back then was best known for his time on Saturday Night Live, and is now perhaps more famous for his political rants. Politics aside, Miller brings the same “too cool for the room” energy here as he did on SNL, playing a cynical private eye who ends up tangling with seductive but murderous vampire Lilith (Angie Everhart). Bordello of Blood was never going to win awards, but it’s fine for what it is.
2. Tales from the Crypt (1972)
This 1972 British horror anthology by Amicus Productions served as the first screen adaptation of the Tales from the Crypt comics. It features five stories tied together by a wraparound segment involving The Crypt Keeper, who’s an actual person here, and not a puppet. The most memorable tale here, called And All Through the House and concerning an escaped mental patient dressed as Santa Claus, ended up remade as the debut episode of the HBO Tales from the Crypt series. The movie overall is an entertaining one, but not quite the top of the pack.
1. Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight (1995)
Taking that top spot is 1995’s first HBO-related Tales from the Crypt movie, subtitled Demon Knight. William Sadler stars as Frank Brayker, a man who’s long protected a supernaturally powerful key containing the blood of Jesus Christ from a demon called The Collector, played by Billy Zane. Pursued, Brayker seeks refuge at a boarding house, and soon enough all the residents become targets in the battle between good and evil. Jada Pinkett Smith also plays a major role, in one of her first films. Demon Knight is a funny, gory, scary good time.
More: 30 Years Of Frights: 10 Things You Didn’t Know About Tales From The Crypt
